Dressed in Mourning
A new, more somber template for my new, more somber life. The polka dots were too goddam festive.Of course, without my husband to advise me, I messed something up and lost my blogroll.
Fortunately, I know who my friends are. Someday, perhaps, I will have the energy to reconstruct them here.
I spent over an hour today with tech support trying to figure out how to keep my internet connections. I feel like such a fool; my husband allowed me to live beyond my technical means.
And beyond my emotional means, too.
I'm not sure I can do any of this on my own.
posted by Unknown @ 4:33 AM
7 Comments:
and what we see is simply beauty, beautifully done.
we love all your colors because they are your real colors.
we might wish that you could be more gentle with yourself and know you are doing such hard things you can not possibly mess up ... just to be doing what you are doing day by day is its own success ...
but even your feeling this is simply one of your colors. and we accept all the colors you need to wear.
/ehj2
Ah, but you CAN do it, D. Just take it one day at a time.
hang on tight. I know you can do it!
You CAN do this. Hang in there. I am so sorry you're having to go through this. :(
As sure as I am that you can do it, I am twice as sure you wish you didn't have to do it like this...So, so sorry. Thinking of you and the wee one...
This isn't very inspirational, but here it is: you CAN do it, because you HAVE to do it. There is no other choice. Your daughter needs you, and so you will do this as best you can. Giving up isn't an option. You may feel like you're "muddling through," but muddling is good enough.
And from what I know of you, you're doing *far* more than muddling through. I have been amazed by your self-awareness and strength. You are anything BUT a fool.
In two weeks, I will wrap you in my arms, and I will cry with you.
D. said: I feel like such a fool; my husband allowed me to live beyond my technical means.
Which is, my guess, another reason you love him. And why I admire you so much. Living beyond "your means" takes so much courage right now. Your words help to make me brave too.D.
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