Thursday, August 25, 2005

Scenes from the mall

Okay, it wasn't actually a "mall"--it was a big-box store. The scene: a lengthy line of bargain hunters, each burdened with jumbo-sized cartons of various household goods, essential and not, winds its way back nearly to the pallets of snack foods reaching toward the sky. The characters: our newly "doctored" Dorcasina and her formerly lovely daughter, now officially a participant in the terrible twos and henceforth to be known as the Holy Hellion.

HH (in a loud, piping voice, futilely called the "outdoor voice" by her benighted parents): "Mama, Mama, Mama, Mama, Maaaaaa Maaaaaa! Maaaaaa! Maaaaa!"

Dr. D (who is, it will be noted, standing at the cart, within six inches of the HH, wondering what decibel level HH is currently achieving, and hoping to distract her from the incessant shrieking), quietly: "That's DOCTOR Mama, baby!"

HH (at even greater volume and pitch): "YOU"RE NOT A DOCTOR!! YOU'RE NOT A DOCTOR! YOU'RE NOT A DOCTOR! &c."

Can we spell "reality check," people?


At 2:03 PM , Blogger Prof. Me said...

Love it! Why is it that their most embarrassing comments are reserved for the mall or some other large place that makes their high-pitched voices sound so loud? My most embarrassing toddler moment is from an actual mall restroom, when, while changing my son's diaper, he cried, "Don't touch my scrotum, Mom!"

I didn't know whether to be mortified at the phrase or proud that my son knows the proper terminology for male anatomy.

At 3:10 PM , Blogger Dorcasina said...

Prof. Me: be proud! Be very, very proud. I'm always envious of ABDMom when Pistola correctly identifies her "vulva."
My daughter uses the kinds of non-anatomical euphemisms that I'm embarrassed to have taught her. You'd think I'd never seen "Our Bodies, Ourselves"...

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