Trust me on this
Things NOT to do on what should be the 5th anniversary of your marriage, but is pretty much already wrecked by your having been widowed 1.5 years earlier:1. Sit at the restaurant table next to two obnoxious and affluent young couples who decide to share anecdotes about their courtship and marriage.
2. Think "it's too much trouble to move now," when they discuss their respective proposals and vows.
3. Tell yourself, "We're almost finished eating, anyway," when the younger of the two women complains that her then-future M-i-L "wouldn't cosign for anything over a carat" when her now-husband purchased her engagement ring, or continue listening as she scoffs, "I won't even wear it, now." (Who cares about sentiment or symbol if it's less than a carat's worth?)
4. Totally lose it when the husband of >1-carat-bitch remarks that his wedding ring is titanium, the same as your husband's ring, which you still wear, along with your own, on your left hand.
5. Drive to evil corporate megastore in search of cheap jeans, thereby compromising every ideal you and your late husband cherished and making a mockery of his memory.*
6. Realize while slogging up and down the aisles of ECM that "They" (the communists, terrorists, neo-cons, Chinese, or bogeyman of your choice) have already won, because "we" are so engrossed in purchasing ever more, more cheaply made consumer goods that a)we are too fat and slow to escape an attack; b)we are too buried in plastic junk to breathe for ourselves, let alone defend our repulsive way of life; c) we've purchased our way into international servitude for the savings on one plastic beach ball and some "Hello, Kitty" flip flops.
7. Answer the phone when it's your M-i-L calling. Especially since she won't even mention what day it is.
8. Get out of bed at all.
*Actually, he'd say it's not a big deal to go there one time. He frequently thought I made too big a deal out of such things, and he was right.
Labels: self pity
posted by Unknown @ 3:02 PM
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